i dun get it. i did NOTHING. look, its nothing. i did nothing wrong but i recieved lyk all those shit from my parents. all i did is not telling em tt i wont be home for dinner. dey started ranting at me once i step into e house. i was so freak out n my day was reali bad. i wasnt in sucha good mood cause mum spoilt it all. seriously, i rather go down for dental appointment myself. she was yaking non-stop all e way, throughout e whole journey about me not studying. freak it. YES. school has not started. i do not noe wth she wants me to study. she kept pressing me to study my math. i did okiee. i did yesterday. she din bloody see it n she started accusing me! i was reali reali angry. n once i stepped into e bathroom, i cried like an idiot. n i was trying real hard to vent my anger by stomping my foot. i noe dey sensed tt im angry but instead of shutting their mouths, dey ranted more den usual. i dun get it. its just me not telling em tt i wont be home for dinner n i freaking reach home at 8.45. im more den feeling depressed. sometimes i just feel tt God reali love me so much so much. but again, i just feel tt he's leaving me alone. i felt reali bad now. i was asking God lyk m i e one going through all these n e fact is tt im going through it myself and im pretty sure half of me was blaming God. i cried like an idiot n was blaming God but i actually felt his presence. tt's y i feel bad! perhaps he din reali leave me alone, infact he was beside me all e while. i just choose to tink he left me alone. but God's reali awesome. he just gave me tt particular peace i needed so badly just now. im so sure he wiped my tears away for me! n tt's when i decided to stand up and tell myself tt everything's going to be alright. n true enuff. e rantings stop once i step out of e bathroom. see! God's so good to mee. haha. yes, i noe i contradicted myself. but i simply carn stop myself from saying how good God is treating me. im so glad im falling in love with him and not others! alright. seriously, i neglected God e whole entire day n when i finally realised tt was when i tink i carn seem to get everything right on e track. i reali wan life of juz me n God alone. just e both of us. but like wad angela told me, e more u wan to commit ur life to God, e more u wan to spend time with him, e more u say u are prepared to serve him, something else will just start arousing n stop u from doing everything u wan to do with God. i dun blame God for it. i guess its just another trail to go through and im willing to go for it cause i believe n i trust tt if God put me through this, he will walks me out of it as well. tt's how much he loves me. yes, i love him as well!

daddy,
u noe wadd? im happy to noe u. im happy to be ur girl. im happy tt my life get to revolve ard u. but im real sorry to blame u in e beginning for putting me through all those stuff. but again, when i felt ur presence im totally stunned. stunned by e fact tt u did not leave me alone even though u decided to place tt trail in my life! i believe dere's more to come n dey will be even bigger n complicated ones. but i place my trust in u, tt u will walk me out of it. u ve been e sweetest and e most lovely one ever. i will never leave u alone like how i did today n im real sorry about it. i seek for ur forgiveness and ask tt you will pour more of ur love and joy into this lil life of mine! thank you so much daddy! i simply love u!
amenn.!